Authenticity

I have been following John Will's blog for some time and regularly find inspiration in and resonance with his work. One of his recent entries covered the topic of authenticity in teaching. He writes:  

"I have also, over the years, come to understand the importance of being totally authentic. I am what I say I am – I deliver what I say I can deliver – I am true to myself – and true to my students. Authenticity is very important to me and I believe that people, more than ever, are seeking the authentic experience and become more fully engaged themselves when they are exposed to it."

I strive toward this lofty and important goal when teaching university students. My first exposure to teaching University level students was admittedly a minor disaster. I wandered into my classroom for the first day of classes with a few minutes to spare. Not too many, however - I didn't want to seem over anxious and I knew that "good" professors were never too early lest they had to engage with their students. I wore my very best professorial costume - because that's what I thought professors wore. 

I was never comfortable. Although the students were kind, I was quite dissatisfied with my place at the front of the class. Don't get me wrong, I knew the material. What I didn't know was who I was as an instructor. I was focussing too hard on being a professor, such that me, Bryan, was lost. Taking university classes and being indoctrinated through graduate school provided me with a guise, or mask, that I could don that enabled me to pass myself off as a professor - whatever that meant to me at the time. But, I was never comfortable. 

Two things in my life forced me to take stock. First, my first son, Ayden, was born. Being a father changed me in fantastic ways and forced me to take a look at who I was and was becoming. To do it right, being a supportive and sympathetic father, like being a devoted teacher demands (in my humble opinion) authenticity. I just can't lie to my son - except maybe about the existence of Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny! 

Second, jiu jitsu forced me to confront some very uncomfortable truths about myself. The demands of the art/sport/etc. encouraged a (re)evaluation of my essence and being in the world. The end result is that when I tell people I am a professor, they stare back in disbelief. I don't look like or don't act like the mask I donned not too long ago.

The result being that I'm more genuine to my students and, more importantly, in my everyday being in the world. Now, if only my colleagues would take up jiu jitsu!

Bryan

bjjstudy@gmail.com